PRETTY MOUTH MAN

THE PLAYER

The man who declared 'not a gamer anymore' and then immediately queued up. Pretty Mouth Man is the squad's Brimstone — smokes, stim beacon, orbital strike, and an alt-tab finger faster than his trigger finger. TJC exposed the meta: 'Pretty Mouth Man dies first so he can play Factorio.' Pretty Mouth Man confirmed it himself: 'I'm tired and want to play Factorio on my main screen.' The man is running two games simultaneously and losing both. His Christmas message to the squad was 'Hopefully we all find some skill under the tree this year' which is the most devastating thing anyone has ever said in a WhatsApp group. Once offered 'half a bar of mini egg chocolate' as a carry incentive. A pipe burst in his garage mid-session and he still considered playing. Does magic tricks for crack heads on street corners on Wednesdays (his words, not ours). Chill Good Night speaks for him often, because they live together and she's faster at typing. Dry humour king. 'Horror.' 'Coward.' 'Purchance.' When he does something good as Brim, the squad types 'That's a brimjob' in chat. He has never asked them to stop.

PLAYSTYLE

Drops smokes. Tabs to Factorio. Throws molly. Tabs to Factorio. Dies first. Was in Factorio. The squad once suggested he play Sage but TJC shut it down instantly: 'Pretty Mouth Man dies first so he can play Factorio. He isn't a good Sage.' Brimstone is the perfect agent for a man who needs to AFK every 8 seconds to check his iron ore throughput. The orbital strike is basically muscle memory at this point — fire and forget, emphasis on the forget, because he's already back in Factorio. Agreement style: 'purchance.'

HIGHLIGHT REEL

• Said 'not a gamer anymore' then played 4 games in a row that same night
• Pipe burst in garage mid-session — genuinely weighed up whether to keep playing
• The Christmas message: 'Hopefully we all find some skill under the tree this year'
• Every good Brim play earns a 'That's a brimjob' in team chat — the tradition endures