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THE GLOSSARY

A FIELD GUIDE TO OUR VOCABULARY

01

BRIMJOB

When Pretty Mouth Man does something good as Brimstone. The squad types it in chat. He has never asked them to stop.

02

SITE ADJACENT

Chill Good Night's signature positioning philosophy. Near the site. Not ON the site. Close enough to hear the bomb plant. Too far to do anything about it.

03

CRASHOUT

A meme that TJC sent so many times in the group chat that it became a way of life. Used as a greeting, farewell, battle cry, and existential statement. CRASHOUTCRASHOUTCRASHOUTCRASHOUT.

04

THE GAMING CHAIR THEORY

Scientifically proven phenomenon where Doodlleus's gaming chair loses all power at exactly 11:00pm. Before 11pm: cracked aim, clutch plays. After 11pm: a man desperately trying to stay awake. The chair knows.

05

SPLOINK?

One of Doodlleus's many cryptic one-word messages used to initiate game night. Others include: Oingoboingo? Chimchimcheroo? Boom boom pow? Boing? Doink? Moo? The squad always knows what it means.

06

AYE

Neilatron's universal response to any question about playing Valorant. Sometimes followed by falling asleep before the lobby loads.

07

PURCHANCE

Pretty Mouth Man's way of saying 'yes.' Not 'perchance.' Purchance. It's deliberate. Probably.

08

MAYB / MAYHAPS / MEBE3

Chill Good Night's spectrum of noncommittal responses. All translate to 'yes but I need 10 minutes.' She always shows up.

09

I COULD DO EXACTLY ONE

TJC's legendary commitment level. Will play exactly one game. Unless the squad wins, in which case, one more. Unless they lose, in which case, revenge game. Somehow plays 4.

10

VALORANT OS

TJC's dedicated operating system partition exclusively for Valorant. He dual-boots into it for game nights. This is either extremely dedicated or extremely unhinged.

11

THE FACTORIO META

Pretty Mouth Man's strategy of dying first in Valorant so he can alt-tab to Factorio. Exposed by TJC: 'pretty mouth man dies first so he can play Factorio.' Confirmed by Pretty Mouth Man himself: 'I'm tired and want to play Factorio on my main screen.'

12

IM UP FOR LOSING SOME RR

Neilatron's go-to acceptance message for game night invites. It is both a prediction and a promise. The RR will be lost. The vibes will remain.

13

THIS IS WHY IM THE VIPER

What TJC says after every Viper play, regardless of whether the play was actually good. Misses a snake bite by a full tile? 'This is why im the viper.'

14

THE ODIN PROTOCOL

The squad's unofficial strategy of buying Odins just to watch the enemy team complain in all chat. Is it optimal? No. Is it funny? Every single time.

15

THE ACE WATCH

The ongoing, possibly eternal, vigil for Chill Good Night's first ace. When told tonight could be the night, she replied: 'Look me in the eyes and tell me you believe that.' The squad looked away.

16

NOT A GAMER ANYMORE

What Pretty Mouth Man says before playing 4 games in a row. It has never been true. He is always a gamer. He just doesn't want to admit it.

17

THE BAIT REZ

TJC's signature Sage move. Teammate dies in the open? TJC rezzes them right there. No smoke. No wall. Just vibes. Survival rate: roughly 12%.

18

HEALING GOES AGAINST EVERYTHING SHE BELIEVES IN

The squad's assessment of Chill Good Night when she was suggested to play Sage. She does not heal. She does not rez. She does not nurture. She places a turret and waits.

19

TEAM GUN GAME

The squad's custom game mode. Everyone must get a kill with the current gun before the team moves to the next one. Knife kill at any point skips the current gun. The order: Pistol > Stinger > Bulldog > Marshal > Spectre > Guardian > Outlaw > Operator > Bucky > Phantom > Ares > Judge > Vandal > Odin > Knife. The Lotus 4-knife round is the peak of human achievement.

20

THE LOTUS INCIDENT

4 knife kills in a single round on Lotus during Team Gun Game. The greatest moment in squad history. Nothing before or since has come close. If you weren't there, you wouldn't understand. If you were there, you still don't understand how it happened.

21

FUCK YOU CHILL GOOD NIGHT

Doodlleus's catchphrase. Used after good rounds, bad rounds, aces, deaths, wins, losses, and loading screens. It is not targeted. It is not personal. It is simply the natural state of Doodlleus. Chill Good Night has never once asked him to stop, which the squad interprets as consent.

22

WASTELAND VANDAL

TJC's Vandal skin of choice. Unironically. In 2026. The squad has staged multiple interventions. He will not change it. The Wasteland Vandal looks like it was found in a skip and TJC treats it like a family heirloom.

23

I THOUGHT WE WERE SAVING

Said every single force round. The squad agrees to save. Four people force buy. The one person who actually saved gets destroyed with a Classic while the rest of the team dies with Vandals they couldn't afford. Next round, someone forces alone, has no money for three rounds, and says 'I thought we were forcing.' The economy is a suggestion. Nobody follows it.

24

DEFUSE

What Chill Good Night shouts when the squad is attacking. Not defending. Attacking. There is no bomb to defuse. The squad is planting. She knows this. She does it anyway. Every single time. It has caused at least three people to briefly hesitate mid-round. She has never apologised.

25

THE MINIMAP

A feature of Valorant that Doodlleus refuses to acknowledge exists. The minimap shows enemy positions, teammate locations, and utility placement. Doodlleus uses none of this information. He plays Valorant like it's a horror game — everything is a surprise. The squad has pointed at the minimap. They have pinged the minimap. They have screamed about the minimap. He does not look at it. He will never look at it.

26

MAKE CLAUDE FIX MY NAME

The time an AI was given the wrong name for Chill Good Night and confidently renamed her across 135 occurrences in 27 files. The original site said 'Good Chill Night.' she noticed. The squad's reaction: 'Smh Claude is so rude.' Claude has not apologised. She has not recovered. TJC thought it was hilarious. The AI did exactly what it was told, which is the most dangerous thing an AI can do.

27

PRETTY MOUTH MAN

Formerly Pretty Mouth Boy. Chill Good Night decided he was too old to be a 'boy' and made him change it about a year ago. Or did she? The squad isn't entirely sure whether this was a democratic decision or a decree. Either way, Pretty Mouth Man grew up. He still dies first. He's still in Factorio. But now he does it as a man.

28

THERE'S NO WAY WE LOSE THIS

A guaranteed loss. When Doodlleus says this, the game is over. It does not matter if the squad is up 12-2. It does not matter if it is match point. The universe hears Doodlleus speak these words and rearranges itself to ensure defeat. The squad has begged him to stop. He cannot. He believes it every time. He is wrong every time.

29

THE TWO GAME LIMIT

Doodlleus plays exactly two games of Valorant before announcing he's going to bed. Not three. Not one more. Two. The squad has accepted this, because after Doodlleus leaves, the real second half of game night begins: Golf With Your Friends. The transition is seamless. The Vandals become putters. The callouts become 'NICE HOLE.' The vibes shift from tactical shooter to mini golf chaos. Doodlleus has never seen the golf. He is asleep. He does not know what he's missing. He would not care if he did.

30

THE WEBSITE MAKES MY PHONE WARM

A known feature of this website. Three canvas particle animations run simultaneously at 60fps, a kill feed spawns new DOM elements every 3 seconds, and a custom crosshair cursor tracks your mouse across the entire page. On desktop this is 'aesthetic.' On mobile this is 'my phone is now a space heater.' The squad considers this a feature, not a bug. If your phone is warm, the vibes are working.

31

THE ACE FOOTAGE [CLICK TO VIEW]

Chill Good Night's first ever ace was finally captured on video. The squad has reviewed the footage 47 times. Click this card to witness the historic moment. You will not believe what happens at 0:12. This is not a drill. This is real. This happened. We promise.

32

NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP

A solemn promise made by every squad member upon joining tHeRe's nO WaY We lOsE ThIs™. You will never be abandoned. You will never be let down. You will never be run around or deserted. Your feelings will never be hurt. You will never be said goodbye to. You will never be told a lie. This is the squad code. This is the way. (Also a banger.)

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THE SQUAD NEEDS YOU. DOODLLEUS IS ALREADY ASKING "SPLOINK?" IN THE GROUP CHAT.

Pretty Mouth Man just said he'd play one more. Don't let him down.